Redneck Thanksgiving, How do you know?

[polarisrider1]

How do you know that you are at a Redneck thanksgiving? Your stuffings secret ingredient comes from the bait shop.

[polarisrider1]

Your Thanksgiving Platter is an old hub cap!

[dcsnomo]

Your aunt is your sister!

[doospunk]

Bob and Martha have been married for 15 years. Every morning for 15 years, Bob wakes up, farts loudly, rolls over onto his back and gets up for work.

Every morning for 15 years, Martha says, "One of these days, you're gonna fart your guts out!"


One Thanksgiving morning, Martha's preparing the turkey and gets an idea. Before her husband gets up, she creeps upstairs and places the turkey innards in his pajama bottoms, giggling to herself.


Well, later that morning, Bob wakes up and goes through his morning ritual. He screams as he goes running into the bathroom. Martha laughs, but is concerned after noticing that Bob has been in the bathroom for 3 hours.


She runs upstairs, and is about to knock on the door, when Bob opens up, pale as a ghost. He says, "You were right. You were right. I did fart my guts out, but by the grace of God and these two fingers I got them back up there again."

[lakesimcoe]

Turducken

A turducken—the name as well as the thing itself is a portmanteau of turkey, duck, and chicken (or hen)—is a dish consisting of a partially de-boned turkey stuffed with a de-boned duck, which itself is stuffed with a small de-boned chicken.

[ezra]

when grandpa breaks out a case of aged pfeiffer's that he had been saving for a special occasion

[ubee]

Halloweens a redneck Holiday , you get to pump-kin! http://www.johndee.com/discuss/messages/58069/120880.gif

[jroz]

Turducken...saw that on "Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern" on the Travel Channel. It actually looked tasty the way the butcher shop in Louisiana prepared it.

[ezra]

me thinks i saww dat 1 siten on da porch wid da dowgs wratchen da nabors fancy go getins color set trew da winder.gony tryz it wid a new twisdter gona start wid a coon suff er wid a possm stick a squirl up da possms <font color="ff0000">•</font><font color="ff0000">•</font><font color="ff0000">•</font> and ram a chippermonk up da squirl <font color="ff0000">•</font><font color="ff0000">•</font><font color="ff0000">•</font> and a mole up da chipper mmmmmmmdowwgy who sed you cant have a xmss dinr in nov . can almost smell da fur burnin now

[jim]

redneck thanksgiving...the turkey looks a little strange... and the cat is missing

[polarisrider1]

Redneck Thanksgiving is when you have to decide which pet to eat! Side dishes include beef jerky and moon pies. Your secret family recipe is illegal in most states and parts of Canada.

[vx700xtc]

And the winner is.....jim

[frnash]

&#40;See next post&#41;

[frnash]

<font color="0000ff">Turducken</font>:
Dat&#39;s what da &#34;target&#34; is doin&#39; in an ol&#39; cow chip tossin&#39; contest; ducken&#39; to da left, ducken&#39; to da right, tryin&#39; not to git &#34;strucken&#34;! http://www.johndee.com/discuss/clipart/happy.gif

[mikey]

Redneck Thanksgiving

10% chance cousing billybob didn&#39;t realize that peanut oil is used for frying turkeys and forgot his epipen and gets rushed to the hospital after the first appetizer.
20% chance the turkey fry pot will catch on fire
30% chance absolutely everything served will be fried including all vegtables &#40;including pickles&#41;all cheeses all meats, all deserts and some of the drinks.
40% chance at least one guest gets a DUI on a 4 wheeler or tractor making a beer run
50% chance you will be on the evening news
60% chance some windows will get broken
70% chance the loud yearly family argument will continue on facebook for the whole world to read about
80% chance beer will be the secret ingredient of more than two dishes served
90% chance fireworks will be shot off
100% chance the host will swear to never do Thanksgiving again just before talking about next years Thanksgiving plans and next year by-god she will do the turducken

I&#39;m glad Thanksgiving diner with the family was 4 states away and we couldn&#39;t make it

mikey

[michaeladams]

I&#39;m my own grampa

[lvr1000]

Turducken? Don&#39;t know what they called them, but Meijer was selling them last year.

http://www.mamarocks.com/redneck_thanksgiving.htm